this is my new favorite song, the video is kind of random, it’s some guys picture gallery of himself, i think, but the song i love….

so the optiquest gave out last night, it’s been doing this flashing thing for a couple of days and now it won’t display anything just a big black screen, boo hoo, this is the second monitor that’s died on me since college, one time sophomore year and now. i looked on craigs list today for a new free one and i saw a posting from a couple of days ago so i emailed them, as of yet, no reply, hmmmmm this sucks, now i have to come to campus for internet, i have a polymers test tomorrow, so much to do, so little time, i hate studying, i’m so tired, i just went home for dinner, i made a pita sandwich with provolone, pastrami and cucumbers, and heated up some canned soup, this morning i ate three hard boiled eggs and stir fried asparagus and cucumbers, i feel like eating, like eating the world, you think i’d be satisfied then??

i was really happy today, i went to lunch with my new friends nate and chrissy!! ran into max and eli at the itll, i was so sad last night, i hate how people can make you sad without doing anything at all, sometimes that’s the reason, they don’t do anything, but sometime, they can just be living their life and can hurt you unintentionally, i don’t know why i get so hung up on things that i can’t change or things that don’t matter, i think i make a big deal about things so i can have something to obsess over and give my life some direction or purpose, i really don’t care, what are my goals, my aspirations, my dreams, i’ve been debating whether i should confront someone about something that’s been bothering me, these things come to mind (1) do i really care enough to know (2) do i care about what they have to say to me or is it just the fact of confronting them (3) will i feel better after (4) why don’t i just move on and forget it (5) what’s he going to say/think (6) would i be embarrassed and would i even care about that

so right now i’m contemplating whether or not i should steal this usb drive that’s on my computer. it’s 512 man, my old drive broke down, it just stopped working, it’s a good thing i don’t really use it anymore for stuff because computers couldn’t read it anymore, i lost the cap for it and something probably got stuck in the end, my old one was only 256, should i take this guy as my own, hmmmmmmmm i’ve looked at the files, there isn’t anything really pertinent, all the work seems to be from last semester, and there’s really only like 5 things, would he really miss it if i took it, but the real question is do i really need it, would it be worth it for me to take something that’s not mine knowing full well it was someone elses and that he has files he may or may not need on it.  i’m the ta for office hours right now for visio, which is basically one of the simplest programs ever, which means i am sitting here blogging, it’s pretty much as self explainatory as word is, i made hamburger helper tonight with vegan chicken strips, i thought they were real chicken strips but i was wrong and you can totally taste the difference too. i think hamburger helper is the only in the box maker thing that i really like, i think mac n cheese is so gross, yuck,

movies

devil wears prada: cute but not as good as ugly betty

talledega nights: not as funny as i thought it could be,

snakes on a plane: hahaha my best part was when the snake attacked the boob

night at the museum: cute, not that funny either, more action

mr. fix it: it’s angel, but just like hitch, how can they make movies with the same story as something that’s already come out

aviator: wasn’t interested, didn’t really watch it

feast: second time seeing it, wasn’t as funny

just my luck: teeny bopper entertainment

the notebook: watched it twice back to back, cried just as much the second time

inconvienent truth: what’s with the flashes of gore losing the election and of his childhood, focus man, focus

my super ex-girlfriend: really funny, recommended

the producers: oops, i fell asleep, look cute and funny though, need to see it again

accepted: alright, unrealistic

see this movie: strange but funny, damn that bi guy got so much action

books

shanghai baby: thu lied, there was some sex but she promised me so much more

guilty mind: of course jamie did it, duh, jealous boyfriend

discomfort zone: good overall, went on tangents though, favorite part – “what are you doing with that ladder” “it’s ben’s ladder dad” “i asked you what you were doing with the ladder” “i told you it’s ben’s ladder” “i know, what are you doing with it” “dad, how many times do i have to tell you, it’s ben’s ladder!!”

i worked today and this old man came in, said he was the brother of the lady that works at the mattress king, some stores down, he talked to me for a while, he was so cute, told me how he fell asleep on a tempedic mattress after only a couple minutes instead of the half hour it normally takes him.  he’s from minnesota and he says his sister’s son married a woman from hong kong.  i tihnk i really like talking to old people, when i went to katie’s wedding i didn’t know anybody so i ended up sitting at a table full of old people from her church, they were quite entertaining.  and had many valuable conversations, this lady next to me, barbara was 65, she was awesome, but her story is kind of sad, she’s been battling her sister for things after her mother passed away earlier this year, i don’t ever want to do that with my sister, money is just money, you either have it or you don’t, there’s no need to get nasty with family over it, this other man al said it took forty years to resolve everything after his mother died, can you imagine!! he invited me to join their church, said they love to have people like me their, whatever that means, he was staring at me a lot during the dinner, unless it was a coincidence everytime i looked at him he was looking at me, but he said we should discuss more chemical engineering things, so nice, i should volunteer at the home near where max used to live when i get back to boulder, old people have so much more to offer than people my age, and i don’t have to feel like i need them to like me

i’ve been so bored today. i get this way every once and a while, and lately more and more, i went on all my time wasting site, this, myspace, facebook, yahoo answers, i need to do something more productive man, i went to sushi zanmai tonight with caitlin, max and jon, it was ok, i got the death roll, big mistake, it was so spicy, i couldn’t even eat it, my mouth was on fire, that’s probably why they call it the death roll, i just didn’t put two and two together, i’m excited to get a manicure tomorrow, i haven’t got one in so long, a computing student gave me a gift certificate to this place call ten2o, clever name huh?? like ten fingers or twenty for fingers plus toes, that’s good marketing right there

this year, i’ve been getting so many cool presents from people totally unexpected, i got some chocolate nips from another computing student, then i got a gift certificate to borders from sandy, the advisor for tau beta pi and i got 20 bucks from dan schwartz, the guy i ta for, so sweet, people are so nice when you least expect it.  if only i had money, then i could be nice too

so i’m applying to mit, penn state, univ of florida, univ of calif santa barbara, state univ of new york buffalo and vanderbilt; i hope i get in somewhere, i need to get in somewhere, i just have to, it’s going to be so exciting to move to a different city and experience new things, it’s going to be the first day of the right of my life, hahahaha, well something like that, i think i’ll miss colorado, everything is familiar and comforting, i signed up to interview with shell on career services today, i think i’ll upload my resume on monster.com to see if i can’t get other job things, that’d be cool if i got offered a really cool job for really good pay, how sweet would that be….i can dream

i just found this, apparently thai girls get multiple boob jobs so they can be this enormous, crazy huh? that looks so fake, as in i wonder if this stuff is real, who in their right mind would undergo such a drastic boob job, they probably can’t even walk

i came to campus today to get a good amount of studying done, i read for a long time, why am i such a slow reader, there were so many high schoolers here on campus taking tours and learning about cu, i never went on any of those when i was looking for college, it seems like so much fun, but what really can you learn from being on campus for a couple of hours and asking random people how they feel about it, when you actually get here the experience will be different.  so now i’m sitting in the borgman, procrastinating as usual, why, why do i procrastinate, i can’t read this bioengineering book to save my life, it is so boring, SOOOO boring, i haven’t been on this blog in so long, i wonder if anyone even reads it, i just ate two piece of chocolate, like big pieces, and now my throat is dry, i went out last night, went to bjs with caitlin, max, joe, eli and chris, it was max’s birthday last week, i really want to get this roasted chicken, because then it would have come with soup, potatoes and the chicken, but they were out, i was wanting that so bad, i hate it when things don’t go my way, then i got the cajun chicken pasta, no soup, no potatoes, sad =(  i missed taking an online quiz yesterday, that sucks, i hated when i didn’t take these online quizzes for thermo last year, but this one was for music and it was worth 5% of my final grade, which sucks, that means i need to aim for a 95% instead of a 90% if i want an A in this class, which i do because duh, it’s music class, we’re watching an opera next week, Pagliacci, like from seinfeld, i’m excited, and i actually got to class early yesterday which is like the second time i wasn’t late since the first week of school, i feel like i don’t care about anything anymore, i don’t know what to do with myself

“The warm bodies shine together in the darkness, the hand moves to the center of the flesh, the skin trembles in happiness and the soul comes joyful to the eye.” Allen Ginsberg